My cousin, Kelly, shared today that she is officially 2 years cancer free, thus her odds of recurrence drop tremendously. She's barely older than me. So yes, I will gladly scream that I'm THIRTY-SEVEN!! : ) And smile happily. Thankful to be here. To be healthy. To be happy. To be surrounded by the ones I love.
My husband works so hard. Too hard, in my opinion. I can't fault him as I'm wired the same. I get it...doesn't make it any easier to see him leave at 6am and come home around 8 or 9pm every day. Exhausted. Stressed. Feeling like he's behind and letting people down all day long. I ache for him.
Allergies this year have been horrific. I seem to have got my share, and then some. I can barely open my eyes in the morning...most days they are matted shut. I've broken down and turned on the a/c, heat at night, a/c again during the day....simply because I can't take it. I wait all winter for warmer weather. I LOVE the spring/fall. Summer is not my favorite....too hot and sticky. But spring/fall - LOVE. Windows open, fires at night, preparing the gardens for summer while the boys play. Yet here I am sitting inside with red, itchy eyes, foggy head (from meds), sneezing, sniffling, stuffy. Yes, I'm having a pity party for myself.
Point being...this weekend was not ideal. Between my 'illness' and Shane's work, we are a pair. He did take me on a dinner/movie date Friday. First time we went on a date, just us, in a long time. It was nice to sit and chat with him. About today, yesterday, our future, dreams. I'm reminded no matter how far apart life tears us, that I married my best friend.
I had to run out today for some errands. Shane took the boys for a bike ride after he got home and played outside (as I cannot do this with them right now : (. I came home later to find this....
Perfect.
Often I get in moods of complaining. Anyone with me? About his schedule, about my allergies, about being busy, about any and every thing I can think of. I can't stand to hear myself. And when I get this way I think....I need to spend some time in the Word. This life isn't about me! Its such an easy, human, trap to fall into, isn't it? Especially on weekends like this....birthday and Mother's Day. Too much pressure. LOL.
Some other mom's were celebrated today with lots of family time, garden time, dined, pampered, showered with flowers. Part of me can't help but feel sorry for myself...with swollen eyes, doing office work, laundry and trying to entertain the kids inside while Shane worked all day. Running out tonight, only to get more allergy medication, drop mail off, pick up take-out and head home. Getting the boys to bed to come down and spend some more 'quality time' with my husband while I do payroll and he writes up estimates at the kitchen table. Being business owners has its perks for sure....but not this time of year. I constantly remind myself that I am thankful for the work. The Lord is providing...we will work.
Instead, I'm choosing joy. I'm choosing gratitude. I'm choosing to have a thankful and full heart, as we are so blessed. I have an amazing mom, a wonderful step-mom, a thoughtful mother-in-law. My kids are showered with their love. I have healthy, happy boys. I have a husband who would break his back to provide for us (and practically is). And even in the midst of his stressful schedule, he took time for me, he brought me gifts, he drew me chalk art in the driveway. : )
I have countless blessings. Countless. I'm here (and healthy). I'm 37. I'm happily married. I'm a proud momma of two beautiful boys. I'm the daughter of the most amazing Father in heaven and one very fine woman here. I am thankful....I'm so very thankful that there are people who "love mom", and that mom is *me*.
Happy Mother's day everyone.