Happy Heart

One of those moments when my heart feels so full, so overwhelmed with emotion that I can barely hold back tears.  Tears of joy, as we celebrate the rising of my Savior this Sunday.  Tears of pain, as I think about His crucifixion....cannot even go there fully as a mother of two boys.  Tears of hope, as tomorrow it will be official....we'll own land in CO.  Dream land.  Dream I never knew was attainable or would ever possibly come true. The Lord works in mysterious ways and every day I see His fingerprints guiding us humbly closer to Him.

Finn prays before we eat.  Every meal.  Whether I'm there or not.  He often reminds me if I'm with him and I forget.  Did I teach him to pray, yes. Do I encourage his faith, yes.  But only Christ, who lives in his heart, can nudge him through the Holy Spirit to pause, hungry tummy and all, to give thanks before partaking in one of the countless blessings we have every day....nourishment.  It humbles me.  His young 5 year old heart, praying.  And today, he paused, with folded hands and head down and prayed (quietly to himself) even after we finished.  Happy heart....that my little guy knows and loves his heavenly father so much already that he wants to talk to him more.

So tonight my heart is happy.  Happy for today. Happy for the hopes of tomorrow.  Happy for the gift we have received and celebrate this Sunday.  I pray for happiness for each of you, too.  Soaking it in as I know life is a gift and there are no guarantees.

I'm editing, while listening to the Freedom CD's I picked up at church.  The songs are so soulful and dripping with passion.  I'm editing newborn photos too....which only (and always) makes me smile in wonder of the beauty of life.  Good Friday is tomorrow.  What would this life be without His?  When nothing else makes sense...I have one constant.  One reassurance.  One promise....from Christ.

I don't feel worthy of my happiness.  Its a heavy, joyful tug on my heart.  Not an arrogant, proud parade.  And I will never, ever, understand the reasons why some suffer and others do not.  Why some face unbearable challenges, others soar.  But all I do know is that God commands us to love.  Love in the good times.  Love in the bad times.  Love.  Love Him, love each other.  Love.  Even when my dear friends lose their first full term baby....love.  When a close friend grieves her mother who passed before she married and had babies...love.  When people I love are fighting ugly disease....love.  Love. Love.  Love.  May I always be a place and person where those who come to know me feel LOVE.

And on that note...I have to share this image from the session I was working on.  If you need a little love tonight....just look at this sweet image.  It is nothing but pure, heavenly, love.